Assume every text, email, and DM you send could be read aloud in court one day. Write messages accordingly and remember that your spouse's angry messages can help you, too.

Divorce lawyers will tell you that text messages and emails have become some of their favorite evidence, precisely because people fire them off in the heat of the moment and forget they're permanent. Before you send anything to or about your spouse, ask whether you'd be fine with a judge reading it. If not, don't send it.

The useful flip side: if your spouse is sending you abusive, threatening, or revealing messages, don't fire back in kind. Stay calm and save them, because those records can support your case. Keep your own messages factual and businesslike, hold onto the paper trail, and never delete messages once a case is underway, since destroying evidence creates its own legal trouble.

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Colorado, USA